restless sleep with one eye open. my darling, i know the screams can send shivers. another late night black eye fight as darkness brings the nightmare into the kitchen. and it follows me, hunts me, into the bedroom. the rope burns serve as a reminder that these bruises still taste like last winter. a bathroom floor littered with white pill bottle tops. a shotgun loaded with endless tear drops. as if you didn't know, nothing comes unconditional in this household. trace the scars and remember them. as every ounce of your love sears across my skin. ears bleed from the "i'm sorry i love you's" and i've listened to the needle skip. so gingerly lift my head and drag me across the floor. as the screen door inches away. and i cross my fingers and i hum along. i am not your whore. this all leaves another bad taste.